Thursday, October 16, 2008

Home of the Warhawks.

Can I be up front about something?

I do not care about Calhoun Community College.

How irresponsible can I be? I have experienced art school and now I am a spoiled brat of a student. There are many other factors that affect my grades here though. It is an institution filled with students who failed out of larger state schools or decided to knock out some general education before they move along. No one cares. It becomes contagious.

There is the crowd of kids who come to class baked and leave class only to play their loud music while leaving the parking lot. Exactly like they are still in high school. Calhoun is called the "13th grade".

I have been in a school where art is the reason every person enters that building. Now I am in a school where the other 95% ends up. I feel elitist speaking like this but it's only the truth. It is pure fact that an artist operates, thinks, and views the world differently than the rest. I escape at home to blogs, photographer's websites, and my collection of two photo essays (Figure and Ground and Mitch Epstein's Work).

Maybe I could deal with this in ten years when I'm even more grounded in my thinking. However, now I am craving this discussion and dialogue at nineteen. Craving to learn and soak in politics and the finer things in life and in art.

Well, the thing is that it's the last thing I will see here. It's a breath of fresh air when I meet a Obama supporter. It's not refreshing solely because of their support for Obama but it's consolation that maybe, just maybe, they are thinking outside of the box. That they may take the southern, traditional, conservative, bible belt blindfold off and see what is really happening in front of us. That they might be free thinkers who can form their own opinions outside of what their parents say (who most likely are pastors or attend church three days a week).

Back to the student body at Calhoun Community College, Home of The Warhawks.

Who I should be looking at are the students 35+ in age. I can tell the hard working ones because they come in late for class not because they slept in but because they are sacrificing their lunch break for math class. They are coming back to school with three kids at home and two jobs and making better grades than me. That is who I should be looking at. I admire them tremendously. That is why I do not speak down about this institution so much as talking down about the students who make this place so.. so.. jacked. The worst part? I think am a part of that. Very disapointing.

You know the most frustrating part? This place is so gorgeous in that terrible way. It's so typical of where I am located. Trust me, the thought of photographing this space has crossed my mind more than once.

Anyways, I need to get my act together. I am not going to be failing anything but still.

The problem: I don't put 100% in for people/institutions I don't respect.

It is a double edged sword though.

I am all or nothing. I don't float around in the middle ground. You have to know that about me. If I like something you better believe I eat it every day or wear those jeans three months straight.

It pays off in my photography and in my life. Because if I am motivated to get something I will not stop till I get it. I sound like Stalin or something.

Time to go take a math test that I didn't study for.

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